Hand jobs, period sex and a finger up the bum - the Scarlet Ladies sex panel


A Tuesday evening for me usually consists of nothing more than dinner in front of the tv before climbing into bed for a few hours of social media scrolling, any improvement to my weekday evening is always appreciated. So I was happy to be invited to spend a Tuesday evening in March in a cute bar in London surrounded by sex positive ladies and gentleman thanks to Scarlet Ladies. 

Scarlet Ladies are a London based social hub who aim to empower women to embrace their sexuality and break the stigma surrounding sex. They host monthly events where women can learn more about their sexual selves. As a sex positive woman who is all about exploring and empowering it sounded completely up my street, so I was happy to be invited along to their March event - Grill the Guys.

Held at The Chapel Bar in Angel, the Grill the Guys event was the Scarlet Ladies first ever all male panel, giving women a chance to hear things from a male perspective and ask all those questions we've secretly been wondering. An audience of around 30 squeezed into the panel space ready to get to know the 6 men who had volunteered to open up and get honest with us. The panel was hosted by the hilarious Alix Fox, a journalist and 'sex-spert' who kept the conversation flowing and stepped in at any tough moments, giving her expert knowledge as well as keeping us laughing constantly.


The guys 
Just a heads up - some of the links below may contain explicit NSFW content, click wisely. 

Paul Thomas Bell was the resident dating expert on the panel, he let us know all about his first time having sex, which featured a lab coat and goggles, he's also not afraid of a finger up the bum, just something to keep in mind ladies! 

Exhibit A, the anonymous sex blogger talked about the joys of hand jobs, and encouraged us women to give them more often, it's not about being better at making him cum than he can himself, its the sensation of being touched by you that men enjoy! He also advocates period sex and has been to a sex party dressed as Doctor Who. 

Andrew the firefighter, dressed in a purple suit he gave of the vibe of a man who knows what he wants, but what really came across was his respect for women. 'I never expect sex' he said, even if she's naked in bed with him he's just happy to be there with you, what a gentleman! 

Michael looks like your average middle aged man, more vanilla than vanilla kind of guy, but if anything tells you looks can be deceiving it's him. A fan of CFNM - Clothed female, naked male for all those not hot on their sex acronyms - Michael enjoys humiliation, and his best sexual experience involved being a pony in his local woods. 

Terrance's work life revolves around sex, quite literally, he is a pornographer who films real couples having real sex. 'Great sex doesn't always look great' he said after describing an orgy he filmed that ended up looking a bit like a crime scene after one female came on her period, he debated stopping filming but figured they were all having a great time so why let a bit of blood stop things. 

Master Dominic was a character you couldn't forget, an award winning professional dominant he had some stories to tell and a unique insight to give being the only homosexual man on the panel. Currently training to smoke a cigar from his asshole, Dominic has had requests for things that might never have crossed your mind. He also says that every women should at least once 'take a running kick at a man's balls and have him say thank you your majesty' - what do you think ladies?!

The panel

The panel touched on some hot topics, Exhibit A's perspective on hand jobs needing a revival was shared by the other panelists, period sex was given an all round YES from the men, and the discussion of consent was covered - always, without fail, it's needed. 

As well as lots of laughter the panel brought up some sensitive areas of under-age sex, consent, race-play and even holocaust play. These areas were all noted for their sensitivity, but not delved into too deeply. It showed that although sex should be fun and about people enjoying themselves we need to remember that for some people that isn't always the case, and therefore in any situation where sex is being discussed we should be sensitive to people's experiences. 

Overall the event was a interesting insight into the mind's of a selection of men, a judgement free, sex positive place for people to feel comfortable and confident discussing their sexual interests and learning about other people's desires. Although we got to hear from all the men there was a general consensus that the introductions went on too long, and that less panelists or more time might have allowed the panel to cover more topics and delve a little deeper. 


The discussions didn't end with the panel though, afterwards everyone grabbed a drink to mingle and continue the discussion. Talking about sex with complete strangers is very liberating, and is a great way to explore your own sexuality and learn about things you might never have considered. The evening ended with a prize draw for a Revel Body SOL Sonic Vibrator, after submitting our top sexual fantasies one was chosen and if you were brave enough to admit it was yours you were the winner. Well, I was happy to admit the winning sexual fantasy was mine, so I came home with a new toy to play with! 

My first Scarlet Ladies event has definitely sparked my interest and I hope to be able to attend more, it was such a fun evening and I'd highly recommend it to any ladies in London who want to talk about sex with some fellow sex positive women and men. Their next event is 'Female's Fess Up' another panel hosted by Alix Fox this time featuring all women discussing sex and relationships.

Scarlet Ladies invited me along to this event in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts are my own, other than those from the wonderful panel! 

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